'I Was Really Going Places You Know' - The Lament of Tuy

Tuy is one of the important female characters in The Aten Sequence Books, efficiently looking after the practical side of Aten's life at the villa, while at the same time being a sarcastic thorn in his side.  But she too has her story and her dreams, and being stuck on Earth with Aten had very definitely never been part of her plans.

‘I was really going places you know,’ Tuy gulped, as two fat teardrops formed in the corner of her eyes and slowly tracked their way down her flushed cheeks.

‘I had plans, I had dreams, I was really going places.  And now look at me?  Stuck here in this hot, dusty hellhole that doesn’t even have a proper power supply.’

The guard cat broke off from his morning ablutions to fix her with his enigmatic feline stare.

‘Don’t look at me like that.  It’s not my fault that the only thing I’ve got to talk to is a cat.  At least you don’t answer back, which is more than I can say for some of them round here.’

Tuy flung the onions she had been peeling into the bowl with unnecessary vigour and turned around to fetch the goose that was hanging on the wall behind her.

‘And don’t think that I don’t know what you are up to?  If you put so much as one paw on this goose carcass, you’ll be going into the pot with it.  Don’t think I don’t know where that stuffed carp went last week.’

The guard cat looked mildly offended at this insinuation and returned to lovingly licking his front leg.

‘See, even you don’t take me seriously,’ Tuy wailed, as fresh tears started tumbling down her face.

‘But you don’t know; none of you know. I was really going someplace, someplace special.  I was the only one out of my clutch to even make it external processing and do you know how many get through and are given an exit permit? Only 2%!  I was in the top 2% of my clutch and look at me now?  A single mother stuck on a backward planet I don’t even know the name of.  Motherhood was never what I wanted, especially not at my age. And what am I going to do with him? There aren’t any opportunities for a young Galasian here and it’s no life for him stuck in that shed all day.’

The guard cat switched to cleaning his other front leg without even looking up to acknowledge Tuy’s distress.

‘He needs to be out in the fresh air, running and playing with the other youngsters. Not shunned for being different and locked away as if he were a monster.’

These words did cause the guard cat to temporarily interrupt his washing and look up at Tuy with an air of disbelief.  His sensitive nose could detect the rank odour of Piy locked up in his shed, even this far away in the kitchen, despite the strong tang of onions that was in the air and the gamey scent of a goose that had been hanging for a long time.

‘And it wasn’t just the exit permit I got.  I was one of only seven hundred and twenty females to be admitted into the Galactic Cocktail Shaking School on Mildorium 27.  Can you even begin to imagine what an achievement that was?’

The guard cat yawned delicately and turned around to lick his nether regions.  When would the tedious woman shut up?  At this rate she would never turn her back, so he could get at that goose.  She might think she had a hard life down here, but really she had no clue as to what he had to go through just to get the odd mouthful of food occasionally.  And cocktails? Really? She would have been better off going to a good mousing academy, though god knows how many small rodents she would have to kill every day to keep that malodorous turnling of hers fed.

‘It’s bad enough that you ignore me when I’m trying to talk to you, but do you have to wash your private parts on my kitchen table?” she asked him irritably.  ‘And how come you can’t talk like those royal cats can?’

If the guard cat had eyebrows he would have raised them in disbelief. Why on earth did the woman think he would talk to her? Having to listen to her rants as he was waiting for food was bad enough.

‘I was great at the cocktail shaking school; one of their fastest learners ever.  By the time I graduated I could mix over fifteen hundred cocktails from fourteen different planetary systems.  And did you know that I was one of only eight thousand graduates ever licensed to use slieppel juice from Grandorminian 75?  That stuff can fell a Lotkair Sloth with just two drops.  I had my pick of jobs.  I really thought that bar in the mining belt was going to be the first step in a glittering career.  It was just oozing with rich miners and droids, all with plenty of cash in their pockets and out for a good time.  The tips were fabulous.  Did I tell you the story of the night that tulsphate miner dropped a 560 carat diamond in my cleavage?

The cat elegantly stretched and then curled up into a ball of mackerel striped fur.  Was the woman going to rant all night?  What he really wanted was to have a quick nap, but he could almost guarantee that as soon as his eyes were closed that goose would be put in the baking pot and he would have lost his chance. But it couldn’t hurt to let the woman think he was asleep.

He could hear that Tuy had started plucking the large bird.  Time was running out and, in the mood she was in, he wasn’t sure he wanted to be around when she started to chop it up with her cleaver.

‘You can ignore me if you want, but I’ve still got my story.  That tulsphate miner loved me you know.  Said he’d take me on his next prospecting trip and buy me anything I wanted. Oh why did Aten have to come into my bar that night?  There were seventy five others on that strip. I mean it’s not like I ever fancied him or anything, but I’d never met one of the immortal ones before.  It’s not often a girl gets a chance to party with a member of the First Families.  He offered to show me his space ship and the next thing you know we’ve run out of fuel in the middle of nowhere. ‘

The guard cat curled up even tighter in the hope the woman would take the hint and stop talking.  Tuy, however, was just getting into her stride.

‘I mean how does one of the immortal ones do something that stupid?  They’re supposed to be role models for us, right? People we can look up to, not incompetent idiots who run out of fuel and then don’t know how to fix the problem.  If I’d known that I was going to be stuck sweeping and cooking in a scratchy linen robe and too much eye make-up I would have just stayed on the home planet.  I could have raised several clutches by now, not just one turnling.’

The guard cat could feel himself gradually dozing off.  His was so sleepy he felt like his head had been stuffed with cotton wool.  The woman’s voice now just sounded like a constant drone in his head and she wasn’t showing any signs of stopping any time soon.  If he wanted that goose he would have to do something drastic.

There was only one thing he could think of that was guaranteed to get her out of the kitchen in a hurry, leaving his coveted prize unattended.  So he slowly reached out his mind, probing until he found the wooden door of the shed Piy was locked in.  He could sense the Galasian turnling impotently hammering at the rough wooden slats trying to get out, so he pulsed some energy into the stout piece of rope that was holding the door closed.  After a few seconds it ignited in a blaze of hot, blue flames that rapidly burned through the rope. The next time Piy’s fist hit the door it swung abruptly open.

Any time now thought the guard cat smugly, as he started counting down from ten.  Ten, nine, eight, seven ....... Suddenly, a loud female scream, followed by the guttural roar of a Galasian turnling shattered the late afternoon silence that had been hanging over the villa.  More screaming and the sound of running feet followed.

Tuy, her tearful rant rudely interrupted by the commotion, angrily slammed the half-plucked goose back down on the table in a cloud of grey and white feathers.

‘Not again,’ she screamed. ‘How did he get out this time?  And why are those stupid girls screaming, it’s not like he’s anything to be scared of. I suppose I’m going to have to go and sort it out.  Not like anyone else is going to.’

She quickly wiped her hands clean on the scrap of linen she used as a towel and ran out of the room in the direction of the screaming.

The guard cat waited until he could hear her footsteps pounding down the verandah, before he lifted his head and looked at where the goose was now lying on the kitchen table.

These humans think they are so clever, he thought as he dragged the large bird off the table and out into the courtyard.  Now he could have his dinner in peace in his special hiding place behind the dung heap, have another leisurely wash and a good long sleep.

Introducing ‘Hall of the Golden Crocodiles – The Aten Sequence 2’

It always felt a little strange talking about a series of books when there was only one available, but at last there is actually an Aten Sequence!  It feels like it has been a long time coming, but the second book in the series ‘Hall of the Golden Crocodiles – The Aten Sequence 2’ has now been self published and is available as an ebook on Amazon Kindle, ibookstore, Barnes & Noble, Reader Store (Sony), Kobo, Copia, Gardners, Baker & Taylor, eBookPie, eSentral, and Scribd.

The Temple of Karnak

In this second book in the series, we find our immortal friend Aten getting ever more desperate.  He is very close to running out of fuel and, now that the High Priest Neferhotep is even more suspicious of him, it looks like his chances of getting at the gold stored in the vaults beneath the Temple of Karnak are even slimmer. As taking responsibility is not his style, he blames his travelling companions the half man/half basset hound Druitt, the tempestuous Galasian cocktail waitress Tuy and Luke the rebel teenager from the 21^st century for all his troubles.

So he sends Luke and Neferptah back to the palace to be educated in the Kap, a military training school for the royal princes and nobles, with Prince Dhutmose and his pals, in the hope that they will be able to find a way into the temple for him. Of course he neglects to tell the boys that’s why they are there and eventually has to blackmail Luke into going in search of the Princess Merytamen, in the hope that she will be able to lead him to his goal.

So once again the two boys find themselves stealing through the palace corridors in the middle of the night, desperately hoping they will not be caught.  But their pursuit of Merytamen sets off a chain of events that eventually leads them deep into the tunnels and halls beneath Karnak, on a dangerous quest to find the princess.  As their friends from the palace try and find them before they are missed and Aten follows them in hot pursuit of the gold, can the two boys survive the dangers that lie before them?

Because there are ancient spells protecting the darkened corridors and vaults of the temple; powerful magic that can only too easily be awakened by unwary trespassers in this most sacred part of Karnak.  There is also the little matter of an irate High Priest, who is a powerful magician in his own right and who would do anything to keep them away from the princess, to contend with.

The Temple of Karnak

Hall of the Golden Crocodiles is a light hearted science fantasy novel suitable for both young adults and older readers, featuring all of your favourite characters from Pharaoh’s Gold. There are also some exciting new characters for you to meet such as the talking royal cat Ta-miu, Prince Amenophis’s creepy new friend Mahu and the tomb robber Parneb.  But it is someone from Aten’s past that causes the biggest surprise; a new arrival that could make his life even more complicated.

So will Aten get the gold he so badly needs and manage to make enough fuel to leave Earth and join his Uncle Lucie at last?  Or will all his plans just fall apart again, leaving him stuck forever?  Whatever happens, you can bet that none of it will be his fault and that there will be plenty of adventures along the way.


Download your copy today to find out!

Pharaoh's Gold - The Aten Sequence 1

Well I never thought that I would ever actually get to this point.  After years of prevaricating, procrastinating, not writing the end, re-writing, splitting the book into two, adding new characters and sub-plots, editing, formatting and general dithering, my very first full length science fantasy novel for young adults, Pharaoh’s Gold – The Aten Sequence 1, is being self-published on 7^th January 2013 through BookBaby.  It will be available to download through Amazon Kindle, iBookstore, Sony, Kobo, Barnes & Noble, Copia, Gardner’s, eBookPie, and eSentral and will retail for $1.99 in the US and around £1.20 in the United Kingdom.

So what is Pharaoh’s Gold all about?  It follows the adventures of an immortal being called Aten, who is now stuck on Earth because he forgot to fill up with fuel at the last intergalactic service station.  As he was on course to meet up with his wicked Uncle Lucie and help him conqueror the Universe, time is of the essence and he is desperate to find enough gold to make more fuel for his ship.  His has already tried other time zones on Earth and has acquired a couple of travelling companions on the way. One is a Victorian gentleman with the facial features and paws of a basset hound called Druitt and the other a teenage boy called Luke from the 21^st century.  Add a tempestuous Galasian cocktail waitress and a wayward computer that calls itself Zoom into the mix and it’s easy to see why Aten’s plans to get into the vaults of the great temple of Karnak in Thebes do not exactly go to plan.  Aten completely underestimates the obstacles that he will have to overcome and, crucially, also the talents and dedication of the Egyptians who will do anything in their power to protect the treasures of their temple. Will he be able to outfox the mighty High Priest Neferhotep?  Will he be able to manipulate the politics and rivalries of Pharaoh’s court to his own end, so that the next Pharaoh to hold the seals of Karnak’s gold vaults will be one of his own making?

While the names of the Egyptian royal family that I have used from this time in Ancient Egypt’s 18^th dynasty are real, this book is pure fantasy and has no basis in historical fact.  I do hope that Pharaoh Amenophis III and his family are not turning in their mummy wrappings at my fictional descriptions of their looks, characters and life stories.  But as the very worst thing that could happen to an Ancient Egyptian after death was to be forgotten, their names erased from history and never uttered again, they might just be grateful that their names are being brought back to life and back on the lips of the living.

Pharaoh Amenophis III

I started writing this book one rainy Sunday afternoon in 2006 and was totally amazed that I wrote close on 5,000 words in a few weeks.  But real life kept on intruding and the unfolding story of Aten and his friends would be set aside for weeks on end.  In 2007 I sold my flat and went travelling in Australia and New Zealand and one of my goals was to finish the book while I was away.  I had dreams of sitting on a balcony overlooking the sea, being gently caressed by tropical breezes and the heat of a golden sun. There would be looking golden sand, swaying palm trees and crashing waves as I typed away, the beauty of the scene laid out before me stimulating my creative juices. Real life intruded once more and I did a lot of thinking about the plot but not an awful lot of writing. However, I got to see a lot of amazing places, met some really great people and took thousands of beautiful photographs.

On my return to England work and social life took over once more and it wasn’t until the summer of 2011 that I really put my mind to it and started writing in earnest. I was so diligent and brimming with ideas that I wrote well over 100,000 words and came to the reluctant conclusion that the book might now be just a bit too long.  From too few words to too many, what was I to do?  Well, my answer was to split it into two separate books which then necessitated writing a new ending for the first part, a new beginning for the second part and a new secondary story line for the first.  I had had a working title of ‘The Hall of the Golden Crocodiles’, but annoyingly that fitted the second half much better, so now had to come up with a new title for part one. See how you can avoid finishing a writing project when you really put your mind to it?

I then had a little diversion and put the short stories that I had written into a compilation called ‘Ghosts and Other Really Big Surprises’ which I loaded onto Amazon for Kindle download.  Strangely enough it was not the publishing phenomenon of 2012 that we writers dream of, although I am profoundly grateful to all those fifteen people who have bought it.  This November I decided that enough is enough and it was finally time to bite the bullet and get this book out there into the world. So for several weeks I edited, formatted, rewrote and edited some more.  The moment I uploaded Pharaoh’s Gold to BookBaby for conversion and to have a cover designed was one of the scariest of my life. My baby was finally leaving home!  Was I delusional to think that I could write nearly 70,000 words that people would want to read?  Had I in fact written gibberish?  Had I even uploaded the right file?  All these thoughts were whirling through my head and it did bring me to a realisation that it is very easy to criticize books and the way authors write, but that every single one of them has gone through a similar process and devoted hours and hours to putting their stories into words.

When the proposed cover design arrived I breathed a big sigh of relief as it was just the way that I had envisioned it. I was also thankful that someone has seemingly magically picked out the image I had in my head and translated it into reality from my garbled brief. So all is now set for the big day in just over a week’s time.  Pharaoh’s Gold is dedicated to Anna McCann and Debra Lestrade who have both followed the action from the very start, have made some very helpful suggestions and have even said that they enjoyed reading it! Apparently, according to all the gurus, I should have started promoting the book over a year ago, so I guess this is a bit of a late start.  But if only one person downloads it and enjoys Aten’s adventures in Ancient Egypt as he tries to steal the gold that he needs for his space ship fuel, it will have been worth it. Although several million readers buying it and thinking that Pharaoh’s Gold is the best thing that they have ever read would be even better!

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